रिश्ता is the key word and has two lives. Generally it means a relationship of any kind, but in a marriage context it means a proposal, and रिश्ता आया है is a significant family announcement. देखने आना describes the formal meeting where a prospective groom’s family visits — a genuinely nerve-wracking occasion that Indian films have mined for decades.

The English terms are used directly in Hindi, and the third category is genuinely common — a couple who chose each other but obtained family approval, allowing everyone to describe it as arranged. This face-saving arrangement is widespread and the phrase is used without irony.

Matrimonial advertisements and websites remain a major institution, and the criteria listed openly include जाति, height, complexion, education and salary in a way that startles foreigners but is entirely normal in that context.

Every relationship gets its own word because in a joint household these are people you live with daily. ननद and जेठ have particular social weight in traditional families, and the सास-बहू relationship — mother-in-law and daughter-in-law — is such a fixture of Indian television that the phrase alone signals a whole genre.

From the other side, साला is the wife’s brother and साली her sister, with the warning that साला doubles as a common insult when directed at a stranger.

दहेज has been illegal in India since 1961 and remains widely practised in disguised forms, described as gifts. It is a serious social issue with genuine legal consequences, and it is not a topic to raise casually with an Indian family — mentioning it in relation to someone’s own wedding would be a significant faux pas.

The wedding vocabulary itself is extensive: मंडप for the ceremonial canopy, फेरे for the circuits of the sacred fire, and विदाई for the bride’s emotional departure from her parents’ home.

Marriage in India is understood as an alliance between families, which explains why the vocabulary is so detailed and why decisions involve so many people. A woman traditionally joins her husband’s household, and the in-law terminology reflects a system where she lived with all of those relatives.

This is changing quickly in cities. Nuclear households, later marriages, women working after marriage and greater acceptance of self-chosen partners are all now common, particularly among the urban middle class. Rural and traditional families continue much as before, and the gap between the two Indias is substantial.

For a learner, the useful caution is that questions about someone’s marital status arrive early and are entirely normal, while opinions about arranged marriage are best kept to yourself unless invited.

रिश्ता has a श्त cluster and a retroflex ṭ. दूल्हा has a long oo and a half-l running into the h. दुल्हन likewise. कुंडली carries a nasal and a retroflex ḍ. And दहेज is two clean beats ending in j — worth saying accurately given the sensitivity of the word.

• Using रिश्ता for a casual relationship, where it implies a marriage proposal.
• Raising the subject of dowry with an Indian family.
• Using साला casually, given its double life as an insult.
• Assuming arranged marriage means the couple have no say.
• Offering opinions on Indian marriage customs uninvited.

1. Learn the five in-law terms from the bride’s perspective.
2. Use रिश्ता in two sentences, one general and one about a proposal.
3. Describe the stages from proposal to wedding in Hindi.
4. Learn the four main ceremony words.
5. Ask a Hindi speaker how their family met, if the relationship allows it.